On the Whatever Podcast, hosted by Brian Atlas, the topic of self-perception in dating takes center stage in a heated exchange between Brian and a confident female guest. The discussion begins with a seemingly simple question: “On a scale from 1 to 10, how would you rate yourself?”
Without hesitation, one of the female guests responds confidently: “I’m a 10. No doubt.” Her answer is met with raised eyebrows from Brian and some of the male guests on the panel. This kicks off a tense debate around standards of beauty, self-awareness, and societal expectations.
Brian, playing devil’s advocate, questions what criteria she’s using to justify the “perfect 10” rating. “Do you think everyone sees you that way?” he asks. The guest insists that confidence and self-love are what define her self-image. “I don’t need validation from anyone. I know my worth,” she responds.
The conversation shifts when Brian challenges the idea that everyone can be a 10. “If everyone’s a 10, then what’s the point of the scale?” he argues. He implies that true 10s are rare and that self-rating should account for objective standards, not just personal feelings.
As the debate intensifies, the guest grows increasingly defensive, arguing that rating women numerically is shallow and demeaning. “Why do we need to be ranked at all?” she asks. But Brian maintains that self-awareness is important, especially in dating, where people are often judged based on looks and compatibility. He claims that being overly confident without humility can create unrealistic expectations in relationships.
Other guests join in, with mixed reactions. Some support the woman’s stance, applauding her confidence, while others agree with Brian that modern dating is suffering because of inflated egos and delusions of grandeur.
Brian also brings up social media and how it has influenced the way people view themselves. He argues that platforms like Instagram reward appearance and attention, which can skew self-perception. “Just because you get likes doesn’t mean you’re actually a 10 in real life,” he says. The guest counters that those same platforms also give women the confidence to embrace themselves, flaws and all.
Eventually, emotions run high. The woman appears frustrated, perhaps feeling personally attacked. “You don’t even know me, and you’re telling me how attractive I am or am not?” she says. Brian tries to clarify that his critique isn’t personal but rather about general trends in dating and self-image.
The episode ends without resolution. Brian maintains that humility and honesty are critical in self-evaluation, while the guest stands firm in her belief that everyone has the right to view themselves however they choose.
